Autumn Raine, Scion, (M.I.A)


Well let’s start at the beginning shall we, as it’s as good a place as any. My mother, it’s her fault. Unimaginatively she named me Autumn after the season in which I was born. Thank fuck I wasn’t American. Fall Raine, hah! But then there isn’t a lot I’d put past that crazy lady that brought me into this world. Shame she died before I found out she wasn’t THAT crazy after all. She had somewhat cryptically hinted at my lineage all along, albeit in a garbled acid-tinged haze. But who listens to crazy drug addled hippies? Not drug-free eco-warriors that’s for sure. I could never bring myself to believe her fables. I didn’t want her fate. She was locked up when I was nine. The hippy commune she belonged to inherited me and looked after me even after her death, so it goes. It was really that place that killed her. She taught me a lot though in the time I knew her. In her moments of clarity. Her main belief was that if a cause is worth fighting for than give it your all. Her cause? Cheating people. Taking money and possessions by telling them what they wanted to hear. Psychics and fortune tellers, man, it’s like a proto church of scientology… Without the aliens, brainwashing and John Travolta… Okay, maybe it ain’t that similar.

My cause is the Earth. This pitiful poor doomed planet. It needs saving. I’m just not sure how. Sick of the hippy commune I left age 14 when I was still very impressionable and quickly got snatched under the wing of BEAST – please don’t blame me, I didn’t come up with it. I’m still with them, I’m trying to steer ‘em in the right direction, if only I knew which way that was. A misspent youth of Greenpeace protests, bombing labs and being a vegan. Urgh! Vegans, talk 'bout hypocrisy. I couldn’t hack it. Wear leather, may as well eat the cow! Plus meat tastes too damn good. Just don’t tell my group, I’d have a lynch mob on me in a second!

Strangely through all my adventures I’ve had my faithful dog Scarab at my side. My mother gave me this scruffy odd looking puppy just before she was locked up. She said my father had sent him to look after me. That was kinda the straw that broke the camel’s back and that was when the men in white coats were called in by the commune and she was taken away. Those hippies sure lived up to their name. I mean they call each other Moonbeam and Skyflower, but you believe you were fucked by a god, she never did specify which, they send you away.